Tapping Into The 3 P’s Of Personal Power…John Page Burton

I have always been drawn to people who exhibit personal power. People who possess personal power present themselves in a confident manner and their energy tends to be off the charts. In other words, you’re not sure what they’re on but you know you want some! Over the past 25 years, I have interviewed and collaborated with hundreds of people who have exhibited above average personal power. Contrary to popular belief, personal power is not exclusive to a select group of seven figure income earners. Personal power is exhibited by children, educators, transportation drivers, office managers, stay at home moms, activists, clergy, cashiers and hundreds of regular people we encounter on any given day. Personal power has very little to do with economic status, it’s simply a way of being. Let’s take a closer look at three traits I consistently find in people who possess true personal power.
The 3 P’s Of PERSONAL POWER…
Purpose. When we understand our purpose, we tend to move with extreme confidence. Purposeful people tend to be focused people which enables them to accomplish great things and serve as an example for others to follow. Recently, I was shopping in a big box store and asked a floor assistant for help in locating an item. Not only did she help me locate the item but she also took the time to explain the features and benefits of several similar products. In all likelihood, she makes slightly above minimum wage, however, her confidence and sense of purpose is an outstanding reflection on her and the company she works for. Her personal power shined bright during our time together! KEY QUESTION…What is your purpose?  What would your life look like if you began living more purposefully?
Passion. Without passion, no one can maintain the staying power necessary to accomplish great things. Life’s obstacles consume those who lack passion. Passion is fuel. Passion is inspirational. Passion is what drove Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Thomas Edison and countless others to take their ideas from the backroom to the showroom. Passion fueled the Revolutionary War and led to the establishment of the greatest country on earth. Without passion none of the above would have ever come to fruition. Our job is to find our passion and run with it!  KEY QUESTION…What are you passionate about? This is the first step toward finding our true calling.
Patience. The foundation of personal power is patience. One of life’s certainties is that sh#t happens when we are making other plans. How we respond when the heat gets turned up exposes our personal power or lack of it. Do we get angry and play the blame game or do we accept responsibility and move toward a solution?  Some refer to this as exhibiting grace under pressure. Patience is power. KEY QUESTION…What areas in your life do you find yourself struggling with patience? Patience takes practice and a great deal of self awareness.
All of us possess a deep reserve of personal power that is patiently waiting to be unleashed. By focusing on the 3 P’s we can dial it in and truly live the rewarding lives we deserve.
Cheers,
John

The 5 Most Ridiculous Excuses Of All Time…John Page Burton

We live in a world where making excuses is commonplace, especially among the truly complacent. Excuses limit our possibilities and stunt our emotional growth. Many of us are unaware of just how many excuses we are capable of delivering in a single day. I challenge you to pick one day this week and consciously take inventory of how many times you find yourself making an excuse. If you’re like most of us, you may be surprised at how many times you find yourself making excuses and just how subtle some of them are. Excuses keep us stuck! If we truly desire to grow personally and professionally, we must quit making excuses.
I have compiled a list of what I believe are the 5 most ridiculous excuses of all time and why we need to move away from these limiting beliefs.
The 5 Most Ridiculous Excuses Of All Time….
IT’S TOO LATE…In reality it’s never too late to pursue our dreams. For example, countless senior citizens are going back to college and earning degrees, the average age of a first time millionaire is 56,  a 93 year old women recently completed her 1st Triathlon and the life expectancy for men and women worldwide has increased dramatically over the last 50 years. “It’s too late” is an avoidance strategy that is keeping far too many of us from taking risks and enjoying a rich, rewarding life. It’s only too late when we’re dead!
I DON’T HAVE THE RIGHT LOOKS…Madison Avenue has done a masterful job of portraying success  as bright lights, fast cars and hot bodies. In reality, looks often open doors, however, it’s our work ethic, ingenuity and persistence that will determine how far we go. If you happen to consider yourself aesthetically pleasing, thank your creator but don’t use looks as a barometer for success. Looks can be deceiving. 
I’M NOT AS GIFTED AS HE/SHE IS…We are all blessed with specific skills and talents. It is entirely up to us whether we CHOOSE to use them or not. I always encourage my clients to focus on their strengths opposed to their weakness. Our weakness is another person’s strength and vice versa. Identify and exploit your unique gifts.
I DON’T HAVE THE RIGHT CONNECTIONS…Making connections and building networks takes time, effort and a great deal of patience. Be mindful of the law of reciprocity which basically say’s…If you help enough people achieve what they’re seeking, those same people will help you achieve what you’re seeking. Givers gain.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN LUCKY…Luck has very little to do with success. Preparedness and timing play a far bigger role than luck. If we are relying on luck to determine whether we succeed or fail, we will be disappointed most of the time. Our job is to create a success plan and follow that plan. (A good coach can be very helpful) When we are focused, determined and willing to do whatever it takes to succeed, the right people and resources will appear. This is a function of being immersed in the success process rather than being lucky. Hard work trumps luck!
 
We all have doubts and fears! We become truly empowered when we trade in our excuses for meaningful ACTION. 
 
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Knowing Sh#t From Shinola, Conquering Life One Breakthrough At A Time…John Page Burton

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Greetings,

First, I hope this message finds you living the happy, healthy, abundant life you deserve! Many of you were kind enough to purchase my first book, Wisdom Through Failure, Guiding Principles for Life and Business.  I again want to say THANK YOU for supporting my message and helping to make it such a huge success! I know from the countless messages I continue to receive that the concept of embracing failure has made a big difference in the lives of thousands of my readers. Fail on! Wisdom is right around the corner!

Second, I wanted you to be among the first to know that my new book, Knowing Sh#t From Shinola, Conquering Life, One Breakthrough At A Time is now available for purchase.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tYV0_hZMoGk  This book offers the reader an honest, no holes barred look into the psychology of human behavior. It is packed with humor and wisdom and is guaranteed to inspire you to BREAKTHROUGH any barrier that is keeping you from living the richly rewarding life you deserve!

As a way of saying THANK YOU for your continued support of my work, I am offering a discount on books ordered between now and September 7th, 2015. *This offer can be used in combination with both of my books.

SPECIAL OFFERS…

Purchase 1 copy of Knowing Sh#t From Shinola and your investment is $15 U.S. $20 Canada. You save $5 off of the cover price.

U.S. residents…2 for $25. You save $15 off of the cover price.

Canada residents…2 for $35. You save $15 off of the cover price.

Both of my books make great gifts for anyone you know who desires to take their life or business to the next level and beyond!

To order your copy please visit the link below….

When you place your order through Pay Pal, please indicate in the special instructions box which book(s) you are ordering and if you would like them signed for yourself or a specific person.

THANK YOU again for your continued support of my message! Enjoy your book!

Cheers,

John Page Burton

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The Richest Man In The Graveyard…John Page Burton

To quote my long time mentor Tony Robbins, “our goal is NOT to become the richest man in the graveyard“.  I have been blessed with an amazing life and by the grace of God I currently want for nothing. I realize that my life could change in an instant and this serves as a grounding principle for how I treat and relate to others.  Recently, I engaged in a conversation with a friend of mine who believes that my wife and I “may be accumulating too much stuff”.  His underlying message is that we should feel a profound sense of guilt for earning an exceptional income and enjoying nice things. In reality, my wife and I have chosen to live a modest yet active lifestyle while we are still alive and able to enjoy it. I encourage everyone to do the same. We designed a plan to earn our living from the comfort of home which has allowed us to split our time between Tucson and the White Mountains of northeastern Arizona. In short, we work hard and we play hard! I believe that as long as we are socially responsible with our earnings we shouldn’t feel guilty about creating and maintaining an enjoyable lifestyle and neither should anyone else! Our goal is not to become the richest person in the graveyard.

SOME THINGS TO CONSIDER…

*He who dies with the most toys is still dead. Don’t identify with “stuff”. We are not our things! In our final days it will be people and memories that will escort us into the afterlife.

*Personal relationships and experiences far outweigh stuff. A quality conversation is just as important as a quality pair of shoes. Long after my mountain bike wears out, memories of the people I rode with will live on.

*Service & outward focus make the world a much better place. GIVERS GAIN.  A life of service is a life well lived. Our willingness to give back to society speaks more about our character than our bank account ever will.

*Rewarding our efforts. When we reach our goals, it’s important to do something nice for ourselves. NEVER allow anyone to make you feel guilty for achieving success.

*Abundance. There is more than enough of everything for everyone. Share the blessing by clearing the clutter. If you are not using something, there is someone somewhere that will. Pay it forward.

*Give credit where credit is due.
No one attains success without the help and encouragement of a host of other people. Give credit where it is due. Don’t brag or gloat. First and foremost give credit to our creator.

*Don’t judge others based on material possessions. Some really great people live in large, well furnished homes and other really great people live in tents in 3rd world countries. Possessions don’t make a person, character does.

Remember, the secret to living is giving.

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SHIFT Happens! Change Is A CHOICE…John Page Burton

“We problem solve from the past, we create in the present”. I tend to feel guilty, frustrated and angry when I choose to visit the past. I feel happy, fulfilled, energized and inspired when I choose to reside in the present. All of us drag around baggage from the past, some of us require two bellhops! Freedom comes when we take ownership of anything we regret or feel badly about, acknowledge that we did the best we could with what insight we had at the time and we move on. MENTAL SHIFT=FREEDOM. “When we change the way we look at things, the things we look at change”. Over the years, I have coached hundreds of clients who formed their identity around an event(s) that happened somewhere in their past. “I’m an incest survivor”, “I’m the child of an alcoholic parent” or “I had to fight for everything I ever got” are some of the more common ways many of us choose to stay connected to our past. The key word is CHOOSE. I know that for years I chose to identify with my past, which contributed to a great deal of discomfort and what I refer to as my “lost years”.  Once I consciously made the decision to “stop identifying with my past” my life began to take on a much deeper meaning.

SHIFT Happens…

Self Awareness. We begin to fully embrace who we are TODAY the moment we make the conscious choice to stop identifying with the negative messages/labels our parents, teachers, siblings or friends unconsciously bestowed on us. When we come to realize the identity of “our youth” doesn’t serve us as adults we have taken the first action step toward creating a permanent SHIFT. With self awareness comes a profound sense of personal responsibility. We can relish our NEW role as the chief architect of our life.

Habits. We can now begin creating new habits that will support our SHIFT. The most important one is our habit of “self talk”.  Do we speak in past or present tense? Is our “self talk” uplifting or self deprecating?  This single distinction/habit is a game changer in the world of SHIFT. Our growing self awareness encourages us to pay closer attention to our “self talk”. We understand and embrace the philosophy of “garbage in, garbage out”.

Independence. Freed from our past programming, we are now solely responsible for creating and designing our NEW life plan. In other words, we have given ourselves permission to paint our own, unique mosaic. At first, this can be daunting because we have always relied on the opinions and direction of others.  The key is to jump in and start applying the first brush strokes on our new canvas. As they say “try it, you’ll like it”.

Faith.  As we begin experiencing results from our new SHIFT, we are establishing a core FAITH in our ability to create the results we desire. Over time, our “muscles of faith” will grow stronger and stronger until they become our new foundation. The most effective way to build muscles of faith is through a willingness to take risks. The bigger the risk the greater our faith must be and this is how permanent SHIFT HAPPENS.

Tenacity. Each time we experience a breakthrough in our personal or professional lives we have effectively established a new point A. We have created a positive reference point that we can reflect back on, one that gives us the courage to move toward our next challenge. Every significant breakthrough in life began with a decision to make a SHIFT.  A SHIFT is the result of our tenacious desire to do and be more.

Until next time….Here’s to SHIFT!

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5 “NEEDS” That Stifle Our Personal & Professional Growth…John Page Burton

We all have needs. We need air, water and food to survive. Most of us have a need to feel safe, secure, loved and cared for.  I believe we can all agree that these are healthy needs. Unfortunately, not all of our needs are healthy. Many are destructive and can significantly stifle our personal and professional growth? Let’s take a closer look at 5 unhealthy needs and what we can do to create a shift.

1. The Need To Be Right. This need causes people to become argumentative, confrontational, condescending and vindictive. This need is Ego driven. The need to be right can be very polarizing in our personal and professional relationships. A person needing to be right struggles to consider any point of view that differs from than their own. Growth occurs when we become open and accepting of NEW and DIFFERENT beliefs, opinions and perspectives. It’s not as important to be right as it is to be respectful in our communication with others.

2. The Need For Constant Approval. This person expects to be acknowledged for everything they do. This juvenile, insecurity driven need is emotionally draining to spouses, friends, family members and co-workers. If you don’t acknowledge and shower them with praise they often become angry and resentful. Growth occurs when we learn to be humble. Our ACTIONS will always speak much louder than our words. We must learn to accept unsolicited praise, say thank you and move on. Nobody likes being around a person who “gloats” or demands acknowledgement.

3. The Need To Be Noticed. A person driven by this need is heavily influenced by appearances and is always in search of a new audience. They tend to base their self worth on material possessions and will go to great lengths to “flaunt their stuff”.  Characteristically, they are loud, boisterous communicators. They will do anything to grab the spotlight and they love to be seen as the “star of the show”. When they feel ignored, many will throw “adult temper tantrums” in a last ditch effort to satisfy their craving for attention. Growth occurs when we realize that substance is much sexier than stuff. People who crave notoriety tend to be seen as “show offs and braggarts”. People who exhibit humility and gratitude are generally seen as intelligent, trustworthy, responsible people.

4. The Need For Control. This need is fueled by insecurity and fear. Control is an avoidance strategy. At a subconscious level, the controller is simply avoiding their own self doubt and fear by focusing their energy on “fixing” and “manipulating” the people around them. Controllers are disappointed, frustrated and angry most of the time because rarely if ever do the people around them live up to their rigid expectations. “Control freaks” have a deep seated fear of being out of control and will do everything they can to control their environment. Growth occurs when we release our death grip on control, face our fears, embrace and accept failure, learn to delegate, appreciate that most people don’t desire to be “fixed” and commence on a dedicated journey toward self acceptance.

5. The Need To Be Needed. In my book Wisdom Through Failure, I refer to this need as “Helpful Harry Syndrome”. Helpful Harry routinely prioritizes the needs of others before his own. At first glance this seems to be a noble trait but in reality it is an avoidance strategy. Eventually, Helpful Harry becomes an angry giver as he comes to realize that many of his needs are not being met. The need to be needed does not encourage self sufficiency. In other words, “Helpful Harry’s” are teaching their children, spouses and employees to rely on others first. Growth occurs when we establish the habit of meeting our own needs before we focus on meeting the needs of others. With that being said, it is important to prioritize the needs of small children, those with disabilities and of course the elderly. We must encourage our adult children, spouses and employees to become problem solvers and doers. Admittedly, many may consider this a “self centered” approach, however, in the long term it will pay big dividends.

The beauty of personal growth is that ALL of us are a work in progress. It is VERY safe to say that none of us will ever achieve total mastery. We are human! Our goal is to recognize a familiar program when it begins to run and make an immediate shift toward our truth. With each shift we lay the foundation for our NEW REALITY.  As a wise man once said…SHIFT HAPPENS!

As Always, I look forward to your thoughts and feedback.
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Are You A CAREfrontational Leader?..John Page Burton

The vast majority of us will serve in some type of leadership capacity. Many of us will lead companies or sales organizations, others will lead classrooms, community organizations, political groups or non profits. The most important leadership role we may ever experience is the role of parent and family leader. We must also focus on becoming a consistent leader of self. During a recent conversation with my friend Ross, he referred to me as a “CAREfrontational” business coach. I asked him what he meant and he replied “you are very direct in your communication, yet your compassion and understanding clearly shine through”. I liked his term CAREfrontational and promised Ross that I would incorporate it into my next article on leadership. Let’s take a closer look at two different leadership models…

CAREfrontational vs Confrontational Leadership.

Far too many leaders in their quest for significance, employ a confrontational, authoritarian style of leadership. Most confrontational leaders believe their approach produces results and garners respect. In reality, this approach is extremely polarizing within an organization and over time it tends to contribute to higher turnover rates and a decrease in productivity due largely to the volatile nature of the work environment. Some of the words commonly used to describe confrontational leadership include; argumentative, combative, contrary, volatile, quarrelsome, contentious, scrappy, authoritarian, unfair and dictatorial. Some of the feelings this type of leadership creates within the rank and file of an organization include; mistrust, fear, doubt, drama, self protection, concern, trepidation, anxiety and security. Confrontational leaders create a culture of ME vs you and “I am always right”!

The “CAREfrontational” leadership approach is focused on the organization as a whole. The CAREfrontational leadership model seeks to identify the strengths and weaknesses of each team member, understand their primary communication style and focuses on exploiting the strength and leveraging the weakness of each member of the team. This leadership style encourages delegation and prioritizes time management. The communication style of a CAREfrontational leader is explicit yet respectful and is designed to instruct not degrade. Words used to describe this leadership style include; team, health, welfare, maintenance, concern, interest, importance, provision, responsibility, collaboration, growth and trust. Some of the feelings this leadership style creates within the organization include; pride, integrity, belief, autonomy, freedom, creativity, expression, fulfillment and personal responsibility. Doesn’t this seem like a more inspiring and empowering WORK environment?

QUESTIONS…

Which type of leadership model do you believe fosters a true sense of team? Which business environment might have a lower turnover rate? Which model encourages vision and collaboration? Which business environment is more authentic to the human spirit? Which environment would you prefer to work in?

The myth surrounding the CAREfrontaional leadership approach is that it is to “liberal” and doesn’t create a big enough gap between “leadership” and the “employee”. I disagree. The confrontational leadership approach has proven to be highly effective in the United States military where breaking our soldiers down and building them back up is essential for survival and success on the battlefield, however, the confrontational leadership approach is very INEFFECTIVE in today’s competitive business environment where INNOVATION tends to trump intimidation. Unhappy, stifled employees, simply transfer their talent to an environment that is more conducive to their personal and professional growth. The CAREfrontational leader understands that TEAMWORK MAKES THE DREAM WORK and they strive to create synergy as they grow and protect the financial interests or their organization.

THE BOTTOM LINE…

Over the past 20 years I have had the privilege to spend time around an array of very dynamic, highly effective, CEO’s and business leaders. One of the common traits inherent to each one of them is their ability to create a compelling vision and sell that vision to their entire organization. I refer to this as the “buy in”. The “buy in” is essential for creating massive results in any organization. Rather than take an authoritarian approach, CAREfrontational leaders take a much different approach. They seek out and hire “play makers” and are then willing to get out of their way and let them make plays. In the sports world, this philosophy has proven to be a successful formula for winning CHAMPIONSHIPS. Another significant trait found in CAREfrontational leaders is their ability to build, nurture and maintain influential networks. THE TAKEAWAY…A truly effective CEO or business leader is rarely the person who has the most impressive credentials but rather the person who carries the most influence. Our personal and professional circle of influence say’s more about who we have become professionally than our resume does. In the spirit of polarization, confrontational leaders tend to infuse their insatiable need for significance into the organizations and networks they belong to. On the other hand, CAREfrontational leaders understand the value of relationships and make building and nurturing them a top priority.

In my role as an executive coach, my clients hire me for one reason, they desire to become more effective leaders. I am not concerned about being popular, I care about my clients achieving the results they seek. Can I be direct? Yes. Do I care? Absolutely. Can I be extremely CAREfrontational, you bet! Do the majority of my clients respect me? I believe my authenticity shines through more often than not. I encourage each of you to take a closer look at your current leadership style and ask yourself if it is helping or hindering your organizational growth? Admittedly, this is a tough question to ask as our Ego has a significant investment in our current reality but it is a question that we must pose if we desire to be the amazing leader we are capable of becoming.

As always, I look forward to your thoughts and feedback.a41