“You’re Not The Boss Of Me”…John Page Burton

As children, many of us frequently challenged the authority of our family and friends by uttering the bold yet profound statement “you’re not the boss of me”. We let everyone around us know we were in charge of our own destiny and capable of handling our own affairs. Obviously this argument didn’t carry much weight as a 6 year old, however, as an adult I have found that “being the boss of me” has gone a long way toward determining the overall quality of my life experience. With the hope of creating a self sufficient world, I encourage everyone to once again declare from the rooftops…”you’re not the boss of me, I’m the boss of me!!!”

5 Tips for becoming “the boss of you”…

*We must be willing to take personal responsibility. We must develop a “bottom line mentality” in which we take ownership for our decisions and actions. Blaming others is no longer an option! When we acknowledge WE are the CEO of our own lives, we will become more mindful of our thoughts, words and deeds as well as their impact on everyone around us. I am “the boss of me”.

*We must speak our truth in EVERY situation. Far too many of us speak a “convenient truth” in order to get along with others. When I am indeed “the boss of me”, I am not willing to compromise my beliefs and values in order to please you. My truth may not always be popular however, it is my reality. Remember, it is far easier to recall the truth than it is to memorize the details behind a lie.

*We must know what we are worth and stop settling for scraps. Often, I will ask a client to share with me what they believe they are worth. Without fail, most of them provide the details of their salary, benefit package and the amount of money they have been able to save or invest. Many of us have become conditioned to tie our self worth to our pay check. As the “boss of me” I know I am worthy of love, respect, consideration, understanding and kindness. If I am settling for anything less, I am selling myself short.

*We must quit cheating. All of us have cheated at one time or another. We have taken a shortcut on a project, “fudged” on an expense report, spread gossip designed to hurt a fellow employee, knowingly sold a defective product, played on our computer during work time or a host of other activities that have kept us from being in integrity. It has been said that if you truly desire to get to know a person’s character, play a round of golf with them and watch how they keep score. As the “boss of me” I know when I cheat, I am only cheating myself, which makes no sense.

*We must strive to set a good example. Our children, employers, clients, friends, family members, neighbors and even strangers watch our behavior. Recently, while having dinner at a restaurant, I observed a man loudly insulting a waitress because his food was not prepared to his exact specifications. His wife, children and elderly parents were sitting with him at the table and a host of other restaurant patrons were clearly being effected by his actions. Is this the type of person we should strive to be?  I often reflect back on something my dad once told me. “Son, your actions are speaking so loudly, I’m not able to hear what you are saying.” Being “the boss of me” means I am mindful of the example I am setting in any given situation and I’m always striving to set a good one.

My hope is that in your mind you will aspire to become “boss of the year” and hold that title for years to come. I look forward to your thoughts and feedback.