Self esteem is a term in Psychology that is used to reflect a person’s overall evaluation or appraisal of their own worth. Self esteem also takes into consideration a person’s beliefs and emotions. I have come to realize that a person’s true level of self esteem can be quite deceptive. We are all capable of going to great lengths to disguise just about anything we believe could be perceived by others as a flaw or shortcoming. I know that I have been guilty of this on many occasions. Our friend the Ego is quite the character.
In order for each of us to create what I refer to as authentic self esteem it is critical that we first conduct an honest evaluation of ourselves and then be willing to be transparent as we begin the work of creating our own authentic self esteem. Here are 6 areas to embrace and master.
- Face your FEARS when they come up. Pretending that they do not exist or actively avoiding them will keep you stuck. The only way to get past a fear is to meet it head on. Once you have experienced your breakthrough the fear no longer holds a negative meaning for you. Enlist support as you work through your fear, it will make it easier for you to conquer it. Celebrate every breakthrough because you have achieved authenticity.
- ASK for what you want. If you don’t ask the answer will always be NO. Every time you ask for what you want you are building muscles of confidence because you believe that you deserve that which you are asking for. You will begin to experience YES more than no and your belief system will change. You are not waiting for the “scraps” of life to fall your way you are actively going after what you desire. Authenticity is YOURS!!!
- Change your language. Speak positive words in every situation. When you begin a negative dialogue you must STOP and remember that this is an avoidance technique that is being hand delivered by the Ego. Speak gratitude for every life experience and bless everyone you meet along the journey as they are your teachers. You are now experiencing your authentic self. No more hiding for you!!
- Make your health a priority. Our health is our best friend. When we are in good health our attitudes improve, we take pride in our appearance and we recognize that we are viewed as people with sound habits and discipline. Our vitality and energy spill into every area of our lives and we are able to face challenges in a much more focused manner. Looking good and feeling better truly showcases the authentic you!
- QUIT comparing yourself to others. This is your race and it is your job to run it!! When we spend our time comparing ourselves to others we are sending a message that says “I am not enough” and this message is very damaging. We are all created for a different purpose. As our lives evolve we begin to better understand our God given talents and how to apply them. Constantly comparing ourselves to others robs us of the valuable energy that is needed to run our BEST race. I have also learned that everyone has a back story and that the grass is truly the greenest where you water it! God loves our authenticity.
- Challenge yourself and get UNCOMFORTABLE. Living a “safe life” is not living life. Take up a hobby, learn a new language, try a new sport, go back to school or anything else you have wanted to do but instead chose to buy into the story that it was impractical or “stupid.” Get out of your comfort zone and learn to embrace your curiosity zone. With each new accomplishment you are building higher levels of authentic self esteem.
This is your life, how do you desire to live it? To create authentic self esteem you must be in integrity with yourself and embrace the journey. I look forward to your thoughts on authentic self esteem.